Sunday, March 12, 2006
How To Break The 'Law'
The first thing I need to get off the bat is: No, I am not trying to cause chaos or racial disharmony in Singapore. I am totally terrified of being prosecuted but I must write this or I'll end up like our hero Tom here.
Obeying the law is a simple task, especially in sunny Singapore. However if you happen to study in the dreary education system and you're in a school like RV, you will need ways and methods to bring in the sun and de-stress. Here is where my little guide here comes in handy for any student.
First to even break a rule in school (or 'law' as i prefer to call it), you will need lots of research on the laws itself. If displaying an obscene gesture to a teacher isn't breaking the law, why should you even try to do it? The primary purpose of breaking laws, rebellion, is not attained here. Therefore this step is crucial for success in breaking the law.
After choosing a target rule to break, you have to add in other factors to the brew. Are there secondary goals to achieve here? Is showing a potential mate in school how strong you are as compared to the old hags in school as crucial as personal satification? You have to consider who you want to show the violation to, where you will do it, when you do it and not forgetting how you are going to do it. Dream up of creative ways to break the law - intending to speak offensive language? Conjure imaginary swear and curse words to confuse your dim-witted teacher! Plotting to stink-bomb the teacher's office? Take the dissected rabbit from Biology class and hide it in the photocopier! Being creative helps you achieve your secondary goals.
Displaying your plumage is as important for finding a mate to a bird as it is vital towards a hip teenager trying to get that emo girl in class. Here are several examples which breaks so many rules at once, you have to be a veteran at it to break all of them.
1. Look at the masculine unshaven face!
2. All the girls will swoon over your dyed hair!
3.Tons of hair gel combined with dyed hair allows for maximum effect.
Now that I've got that done and over with, here is a recommendation to what you should bring to school every day to be prepared to break the law anytime.
1.Bag - for hiding all that hair-gel
2.Plastic bag - for bringing your books to school
3.Authentic replica of a 19th century blunderbuss - just have it with you
4.Dead rabbit - isn't it obvious?
5.Pet rock - when you get all mushy
Pack your bag now! Happy contravening!
DISCLAMIER : The above article might be distressing for you. If you think you will be offended, violated, angered or disgusted by the above message, I hold no responsibility for what I have written. This is a personal view and is solely my own. At least I'm not spreading racist views, are you?
The first thing I need to get off the bat is: No, I am not trying to cause chaos or racial disharmony in Singapore. I am totally terrified of being prosecuted but I must write this or I'll end up like our hero Tom here.
Obeying the law is a simple task, especially in sunny Singapore. However if you happen to study in the dreary education system and you're in a school like RV, you will need ways and methods to bring in the sun and de-stress. Here is where my little guide here comes in handy for any student.
First to even break a rule in school (or 'law' as i prefer to call it), you will need lots of research on the laws itself. If displaying an obscene gesture to a teacher isn't breaking the law, why should you even try to do it? The primary purpose of breaking laws, rebellion, is not attained here. Therefore this step is crucial for success in breaking the law.
After choosing a target rule to break, you have to add in other factors to the brew. Are there secondary goals to achieve here? Is showing a potential mate in school how strong you are as compared to the old hags in school as crucial as personal satification? You have to consider who you want to show the violation to, where you will do it, when you do it and not forgetting how you are going to do it. Dream up of creative ways to break the law - intending to speak offensive language? Conjure imaginary swear and curse words to confuse your dim-witted teacher! Plotting to stink-bomb the teacher's office? Take the dissected rabbit from Biology class and hide it in the photocopier! Being creative helps you achieve your secondary goals.
Displaying your plumage is as important for finding a mate to a bird as it is vital towards a hip teenager trying to get that emo girl in class. Here are several examples which breaks so many rules at once, you have to be a veteran at it to break all of them.
1. Look at the masculine unshaven face!
2. All the girls will swoon over your dyed hair!
3.Tons of hair gel combined with dyed hair allows for maximum effect.
Now that I've got that done and over with, here is a recommendation to what you should bring to school every day to be prepared to break the law anytime.
1.Bag - for hiding all that hair-gel
2.Plastic bag - for bringing your books to school
3.Authentic replica of a 19th century blunderbuss - just have it with you
4.Dead rabbit - isn't it obvious?
5.Pet rock - when you get all mushy
Pack your bag now! Happy contravening!
DISCLAMIER : The above article might be distressing for you. If you think you will be offended, violated, angered or disgusted by the above message, I hold no responsibility for what I have written. This is a personal view and is solely my own. At least I'm not spreading racist views, are you?